What is your intention dating

12-May-2020 04:38 by 10 Comments

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I mean, with every guy I’ve been involved with, she’s been undefeated.

Over the last several years of unannounced disappearances, friend-zoning, and dozens of iterations of “I like you, but I’m not ready for anything right now,” I had no relationship to show for the extra night shifts of vulnerability I invested.

Just because you’re interested doesn’t mean I have to accept you.

When I gently press for the WIIFM (What’s In It For Me), I usually get asked to stall time in some form of ambiguous, discovery-mode friendship. They all know who they are, get on my nerves regularly, and make me very happy.

First, these desires of mine exist given the unapologetic woman I am.

The Type A-minus kind of gal who would rather be left alone than to have her time wasted by anyone.

With any luck they will like you back and you can look forward to a new life of love, romance and passionate lovemaking. In reality, it’s like that game at the fun fair where you have to shoot a row of ducks but nobody ever seems to be able to hit the target.

Fixed or not, it’s frustrating, and unless you’re a crack Marine Corps sniper, you will often go home empty handed. As a “veteran” of over 60 internet dates and nearly 10 years of negotiating my way through the many, many websites out there, I know firsthand how arduous and frustrating it can be.

The trend of men using my openness as a platform to rebuild their confidence and gain knowledge about the types women they really wanted left me, and continues to leave me, empty. All relationships and friendships need to be reciprocal.

Not to keep score, but to avoid a rescuer-victim dynamic. God has the sovereignty to place people along my path.

Asking for intentions is a simple request for an honest, objective conversation about the value of time between two consenting adults. Well, at least that’s what everyone else led me to believe.

But as I reflect on the brokenness I’ve experienced as an adult single, it brings me back to one fact: Whether familial, platonic, or romantic circumstances, there is nothing I will not do for those I love.

It seems like each year I trek out to Los Angeles for the holidays, I have even the smallest of heartbreaks to report on. Not because of the way he was able to get my number after making an awful first impression.

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